A Brush With a Physicist

Have you ever been told that sound in Star Wars, in its space battles, is just ridiculous? That sound doesn’t travel in a vacuum? Well chances are you’ve just had a brush with a physicist or the physicist adjacent.

In return you might want to bother them about the “Big Bang” theory. The big bang is supposed to be an explosion of all matter out of a dimensionless point. A bang is definitely a sound effect, too. The problem is, I envision a dimensionless point by being outside of it. After all it’s impossible for me to be inside of it.

If I am outside the big bang and it explodes into existence, there is no way for its sound to reach me. So why use the term bang, which is meant to represent a loud sound, in the title of this theory? It’s even more egregious than sound traveling in a vacuum in Star Wars.

Not only that, the explosion into existence of everything, I imagine, would be the loudest sound ever. Why waste such grandeur on such a minor sound like bang? Every cartoonist knows that bang is merely the sound of a gun.

Explosions, however, rate a KABOOM!! or a KABLOOIE!! Why didn’t physicists name it the Big Kablooie theory? Or the Big Kaboom theory? Do no physicists even read the comics? The Big Bang theory is just wrong from a cartoonist’s vantage point.

So the next time a would be physicist tries to put you in your place due to a technicality, remind them of the name the Big Bang theory. And instead put them in their place.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
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