Honest Jobs for John Edward

You may remember my nasty post over half a year ago regarding John Edward. He is of course the crummy psychic of Crossing Over fame. I thought of him because again he was on daytime TV. This time it was the bad judgment of the Anderson Cooper show that gave this trashy psychic the spotlight.

Yes, again, I want to say that we don’t have to watch Anderson’s talk show if he keeps having such junk programming. His credibility falls as a journalist – just as Dr. Oz’s credibility fell for me as a doctor for having Edward on.

John Edward’s cold readings really are cold of him. He takes a vulnerable group, the grieving, and to my eyes preys upon them.

But instead of focusing on just the negative today, I’d like to offer something positive. John Edward is a reasonably bright and talented man. Perhaps he can use his powers for lesser evils.

His power of pulling the wool over other people’s eyes ought to stand him in good stead as a publicist. And as a publicist he’d be dealing with other famous people as he already has a penchant for doing like with Dr. Oz and Anderson Cooper. If his clients were famous and getting married he could also use his powers of saying something vague that neither confirms or denies any direct questions.

Being vague is also a great skill of successful politicians. Combined with the ability to pull the wool over people’s eyes he would be just peachy in the political world. Some would say cold readings for the grieving are a lesser evil than politicking. But politicking looks more honourable. So much so that politicians in my country (Canada), demand the title of honourable when they are elected to parliament.

Finally, many a lyricist has made a fortune off of songs that appeal to many people. John Edward can be so vague sometimes that he could be speaking to these many people. And if he chose to perform this music himself, he has had experience in dealing with crowds. At his age I doubt he’d appeal to the crowd surfing, mosh pit crowd but Leonard Cohen and William Shatner have had some success with straight spoken word music.

So there you go John Edward. You could make an honourable change to your career. Promise you’ll do it and I’ll promise I won’t make a voodoo doll of you. For you see,voodoo sounds realistic compared to the things you want an audience to believe.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
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