Eleventh Hour Evidence – and Santa

The five high Arctic nations are currently trying to divvy up the Arctic Ocean amongst themselves. These countries are Canada, Russia, the USA, Denmark (they own Greenland) and Norway.

Here is an article showing Denmark’s latest gambit to claim seabed beyond the North Pole. Some of the countries are making outrageous claims simply because the UN (or other empowering organization that will make the final decision) might side with their bid. So the greediness marches on.

But I bet that Canada’s attempt to annex the sea up to the North Pole or even further will get backed up by unorthodox methods. Canada will say that it has always laid claim to the North Pole. This truth will be presented at the eleventh hour of any meeting and will be ushered in by a crown corporation.

That’s right, Canada Post will bring in mailbag after mailbag of mail addressed to a certain Santa Claus based in the North Pole in Canada.

Denmark and Norway might try this gambit, too, but with fewer children in those less populated countries, the weight of the evidence will tip in Canada’s favour.

The more populated United States might try to dramatically produce more mailbags than Canada addressed to Santa Claus at the North Pole in Alaska.

Under cross examination by the Canadian lawyers it will come out that there are two North Poles. One at the top of the earth and the other which has a couple thousand people as a suburbof Fairbanks, Alaska. Canada will magnanimously allow the United States continuing ownership of the Fairbanks North Pole.

Russia will try a different gambit. They will say that Father Frost(who is thin!) is said to live at the North Pole, too. He gives out presents to good kids in the new year. Shoudn’t the belief in him by way more children in Russia grant that country title to the North Pole?

But Canada’s star lawyer will note that other Russian folklore says that Father Frost simply lives in the northern town of Veliky Ustyug.

So the die will be struck. Canada will have the best claim on the actual North Pole. If Canada wins this part of the world, generations of Santa Claus letters will have done some unintended magic for Canada.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
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