The Thousand Year Connoisseur

There is no doubt that becoming an expert takes a lot of time and effort. To become a connoisseur is almost like becoming an expert’s expert. There is a lot of knowledge involved – look no further than the wine connoisseur who can tell what type of wood the cask has been made of as well as a hundred more little details that are important to them about the wines they consume.

But is the connoisseur as accurate as a scientific analysis of the wine? For some properties I’m sure the science is better. But if we limit the scientific analyses to only the short time that the connoisseur takes in determining flavour, perhaps both are as accurate as each other.

But let’s say the connoisseur hones her skill over a millennium. Might she not become as reliable as all the scientific tests that could be done on the wine? Of course no human lasts a thousand years so all this is just speculation. Unless we are talking about vampires.

Do vampires care about wine in the slightest bit? Probably not but there is one thing a vampire tastes week after week, year after year. That is the blood of a human.

Can they taste blood sugar levels, or any other levels a lab might want to know? I am guessing but I think after a thousand years of feasting on the substance they might know all about a human’s blood readings – even things we haven’t developed tests for yet.

We should hire some of these creatures of the night to work in all of our blood labs. I believe the vampire can perform the needed tests right away without all the time that scientific testing needs. So it’s a win for the humans. Maybe they’ll be able to lift the requirement that the humans fast before certain tests.

And the vampire gets all the blood she can drink just for being scientific in her expertise. Warning. This might lead to overweight vampires that might not live so long. Still, I imagine they would make a quite happy 800 year old corpse when they check out of their comfortable life.

So let’s make friends with these creatures of the night. We can give a little blood and they can help our health system.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet. Now in the Fediverse as
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