L. A. Losers

There are three big centres for music in the English speaking world. They are London, New York and Los Angeles.

London bands sound like the clear winners of all the bands of the world. ‘Let’s see, should I stay in a city that is always rainy and foggy or should I leave to tour the world?’ The answer is always to leave and tour the world. Those Londoners sure are smart. In fact I’ve heard of rumours of some acts voluntarily touring when they don’t even have an album to push.

New York is sometimes unofficially known as the centre of the world. Perhaps it’s not such a good idea to volunteer to tour from here. But with instantaneous communications to keep in touch through most of the English speaking world, it’s kind of like you have never even left New York when you are on tour. Although some New York bands go further north into even worse northern weather, it’s not as if it doesn’t snow in New York in the winter, too. Remember that half the cities they tour are warmer than New York so this of course becomes a wash.

Los Angeles is different. When the city and area isn’t burning or in drought or having mudslides, the weather is supposed to be phenomenal most of the time. The usual dryness leads to more sunny days. The nearness to the ocean moderates the temperature so it is generally warm but usually not too hot either. So it is my theory that only the stupidest of bands wants to tour away from L.A. The losers if you will.

Look at that example of the Beach Boys. They helped make surfing culture world famous. They sang and sang and sang about how great surfing was. Did this make them surf more? No, it made them tour other parts of the United States and elsewhere where there weren’t even surfing conditions. The Beach Boys were obviously losers when they toured the English speaking world.

Decades later Guns and Roses began leading with a song that had a stupid idea as its genesis. Sweet Child O’ Mine was written from a finger exercise that one of the guitarists kept doing. With a slight change or two it became the lead line for Sweet Child O’ Mine. This was so stupid that Los Angeles decided to make them famous with it and thus kicked them out of the city for months at a time, allegedly to tour. Obviously Guns and Roses were more losers that L.A. exported to the world.

No Doubt followed. No doubt you are asking what the no doubt stands for. It seems that there was no doubt this band would tour far and wide and thus lose the niceties of L.A.’s weather. I could go on about the losers that L.A. exports to the world. But by now it should be as obvious to you as it is obvious to me.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t like L.A. bands. Just be aware that if they are on tour, chances are they are losers.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
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