Grab Bag o’ Humour: A Hockey Sandwich

The Florida Panthers banned playoff ticket sales for the first day to non Americans in the 2nd round of the playoffs. This in a series where they were playing the Toronto Maple Leafs. Such blatant prejudice would likely have been condemned if it were the other way around. Imagine the Maple Leafs banning Americans from a series in which they were playing Boston. Imagine the outcry.

But this is only the first day of ticket sales, you might point out. This is the playoffs. The tickets will likely be sold out in the first day.

Since there was not even a peep out of the NHL brass, I guess we know what the National in National Hockey League stands for. America, of course. I guess Canada can now expect if any of its hockey teams are in trouble that they will find a new home in the U.S. of A. Good luck having any new franchises coming up here.

There is a Canadian Hockey league and that is the juniors. I guess that’s where we Canadians will have to be happy. In the Juniors. Soon everyone will call us America Junior.

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Don’t believe the hype. Francesco Mutti hates tomatoes. He claims it’s the opposite but actions speak louder than words.

In this ad, Francesco Mutti notices a tomato about to fall onto the ground from the top of a tomato trailer. He leaps forward and “saves” the tomato by catching it in the air.

What’s wrong with this? Well first of all the tomato was going to fall into a soft bed of grass. Mutti stops it with his hard hand. Not only this but Mutti’s hand is moving upward as he catches it, creating a greater force when his hand hits.

Mutti could have done the tomato a favour and missed catching it. This is also a big problem in superhero movies. If superman catches an airplane just before it hits the ground, it is as bad as if he hadn’t been there at all. He’s got to catch it say 100 meters from the ground and decelerate it so the passengers live.

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The Seattle Kraken and Las Vegas Golden Knights were given golden entries into the hockey world. In only its second season, the Kraken have made it to the final eight. In only their 6th season, the Golden Knights have made it to the final 2 for the second time.

Why is it necessary to give expansion teams such strong players? Why must they start in the top half of the NHL in skills? While the NHL may not want losers for expansion teams, this is going too far in the other direction.

Soon the rest of the NHL will know that the Stanley Cup is out of reach because there is an expansion team that year. Maybe we could start each new expansion team by just giving them the Stanley Cup that year, forgetting the playoffs.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet. Now in the Fediverse as @admin@larryrusswurm.org
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