Before you tell some woman that you love them, be very careful. Mostly, you have to worry about an “I love you!” return. If you don’t get this return, the following may happen to you.
After saying the “I love you!”, what if she doesn’t respond in kind and instead beams at you and says, “Thank you!”? Then she keeps beaming at you.
You’re probably thinking that this is the best possible outcome considering there was no “I love you!” return. But it could also be something else.
Then the magical time comes when she gets you to hold her keys. That’s a sign, you say to yourself, of her trusting you. She might not trust you so much if you hadn’t said “I love you!” The relationship is now in a new stage.
Then the magical time comes when she gets you to hold her purse. Why that’s just further evidence that she really does trust you. Sure it’s a bit embarrassing, standing there and holding her purse but it is also great when you think of how much she trusts you. You also further that trust by not opening any of the compartments and seeing what is inside. Now she will have proof of your love.
Then the magical time comes when she gets you to hold her high heels. This is even more evidence that she trusts you completely. She might be testing your love but that is okay. How she ever managed to walk and stand in these things before you said “I love you!”, you’ll never know. But now she has you and things are different. Now you know why she beamed when you told her you loved her. It’s because she was an excellent judge of horseflesh.
Or at least an excellent judge of things related to horseflesh. Then, you finally get it. She was beaming because at last she had her pack mule she had longed for all her life. What a couple you make. Woman and pack mule.