Canadian Michaels and China

Posted on 13 May 2023 by Larry Russwurm

A few years ago, Canada arrested Huawei CFO Meng Wanzhou on behalf of the US and our agreements with that country. In retaliation, China arrested the two Michaels, Michael Spavor and Michael Kovrig, two Canadians who were in China at the time. I thought it odd at the time that both men were named Michael but it is a common name and could just be a coincidence.

Now, we have found out that a Chinese diplomat, Zhao Wei, had been allegedly gathering information to target Canadian Conservative MP Michael Chong’s family back in China. Zhao Wei has been expelled but one of China’s motives are clear. They don’t like Canadian Michaels.

Perhaps it’s because they know this will receive press in China. By targeting Michaels, it is an attempt to make us look like a political backwater, where all our people are named Michael. Like the bumpkins on the Newhart show in the eighties. “I’m Larry and this is my brother Darryl and my other brother Darryl.”

But maybe, just maybe, China feels put upon by one of our famous Michaels.

The two Michaels that comes to mind right away to me, are Michael J. Fox and Mike Myers. Lately Hollywood has been taken to task for the lack of representation. Indeed I can’t think of a film where Michael J. Fox had Chinese costars and I can think of just one for Mike Myers – Tia Carrere.

Even Tia Carrere is only partially Chinese. She has Filipina and Spanish roots, too. Anyhow, she played Michael Myers love interest in Wayne’s World. Perhaps this would have been okay if Micheal Myers’ career stopped there.

But he kept having love interests in later movies. The Austin Powers movies, the Shrek movies, etc.

I think the Chinese government wants the world to think, once you go Chinese, you never go back. Maybe, just maybe it’s not just a relationship slogan. They might want to have it so once you make a deal with China you never go back.

Especially at this juncture when the west is eroding Chinese successes Huawei and TikTok. As well, the west is not manufacturing everything they use in China anymore. The west wants other options. China, indeed, wants a world where once you go Chinese, you never go back.

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The NHL and Roid Rage

Posted on 6 May 2023 by Larry Russwurm

I want to cheer on Alexander Ovechkin as he gets closer to Wayne Gretzky’s lifetime goal scoring record. I really want to cheer on Joe Pavelski since he is with the Dallas Stars (my favourite team) and continues at 38 to be better than he was in his “prime” years.

It’s just that older players remaining vital long after some thought they would be, can be an indication of steroid use.

Pavelski is playing better than teammates Tyler Seguin and Jamie Benn. Both are younger than him, and Benn even won the regular season scoring race, once. What is the secret to this apparent finder of the fountain of youth?

Then I also think of previous heroes. Joe Nieuwendyk won the most valuable player in the playoffs the only year Dallas won the cup. He said his heroics were induced by extra conditioning the summer before but perhaps it was a chemical that made him better that year.

Chris Chelios remained in the NHL until he was 48. That is unsurpassed in the modern era. Why was he thriving a decade after normal players thrive?

Am I losing my heroes? Shouldn’t there be evident roid rage in these players? Well sometimes there is. As with all players in this league. Was the normalization of fighting in the NHL proof that their players were doing steroids?

The Broad Street bullies were the culmination of violence in the NHL. Otherwise known as the Philadelphia Flyers, that team won the Stanley Cup two years in a row in the 1970s. They also led in penalty minutes.

Perhaps that fighting wasn’t an example of real emotion as the commentators like to call it. Was that an era of unchecked roid rage in the NHL?

Were steroids first tested on NHL players? How far back could this go? As much as I would like an answer, I’m unlikely to get one.

That’s the biggest problem with steroids and sports. We might never know the full truth.

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Clones, Replicons and Exactoids, Oh My!

Posted on 29 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

A clone is essentially your identical twin. You can differ quite a bit from your identical twin, especially the older you get. You will have had different experiences and people of importance in your lives.

A replicon and exactoid are much closer than a clone.

Replicons and exactoids have existed for a long time in science fiction. It’s just that I have named them in my book, Fabricated, and linked them together.

You could guess what a replicon is from its name alone. It is you, brought into existence by a replicator. Your replicon is exactly you at the moment of replication. You might start diverging as soon as you are replicated but you can be 30, 50 or 120 years old when this starts to happen. Obviously a replicon is closer than a clone.

Have you ever known of a time travel adventure where the character(s) end up at the same event a bunch of times? These near identical characters I call exactoids. They are exactly the same except the latest time traveler has a bit more of their brain filled up.

I’ve heard horror stories of would be science fiction writers making clones too much the same. Like the clone knows the original’s memories up to a point. Notice that with replicons and exactoids you can solve this problem. Although you’ve likely made replication and time travel a relatively easy thing to do in these stories. So maybe this won’t save these stories.

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Book Launch

Posted on 29 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

Here I was last Sunday for my official book launch at the Stratford Book Fair.

Get my book Fabricated. To order, go to the right column at the top. Click the image to go to the Amazon site it’s available at.

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Late April 2023 Grab Bag o’ Humour

Posted on 22 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

Few things are as opaque to see as the day of the week that Jesus died and the day he rose again from the dead. I was brought up in a Lutheran church and heard that Good Friday was the day that Jesus died. I assumed that he rose again on Sunday which is why Easter Sunday was such a big deal. But the one thing that is in agreement is that Jesus rose again after 3 days.

Did Christians make an easy counting error? Jesus was dead on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Therefore he rose on Sunday after 3 days being dead,

Or is it likely that the big celebration is on Sunday because Christians believed something was afoot? Jesus would be found alive on Monday after the obligatory 3 days. But because of their belief that Monday was in the cards, they celebrate on Sunday.

An enlightened religion would celebrate the most on Easter Monday. That’s the day we lowly earthlings were given “proof” that Jesus had risen from the dead. It makes me wonder why proof is so lowly regarded in organized religion. It’s almost as if those in power want to make their own rules.

*

We’re always told to keep our music down because it may disturb other people. Especially late at night when many people need to rest up for an early work day.

It seems the only place to escape this is the country. Farmhouses are generally far enough away from each other that farmers can generally play their music on 11, anytime, all the time.

But they don’t. Farmers are some of the earliest risers in society and start work before the majority of other workers. So they end up going to bed at about 9 in the evening, to get up with the sun in the summer.

But surely they crank their music (even if it’s country music!) at times during the day? Well if you can find a farmer with music equipment that goes to 11, then maybe. It’s just that I have never seen that music equipment. What a waste of a perfectly good opportunity, farmers!

*

In a 2015 post I noted that the most popular female name in a song was Sherry. It was in the song Sherry by the Four Seasons and Oh Sherrie by Steve Perry.

But I have since realized there are two other contenders for most popular female name in a song: Virginia and Jane. Meet Virginia by Train , Virginia Don’t Go by Prism, Jane by Starship and Jane by Bare Naked Ladies present two new contenders.

In 2015 I said Sherry was popular because the songwriters were talking in code. Sherry was popular because it is also the name of a type of alcohol.

Virginia could also be code for something, most likely a virgin. Virginia reminds the songwriters of virgins, either real or imagined.

So what about Jane? There aren’t any easy other meanings of Jane. If Jane were a more popular name I would say it wins this popularity contest.

But maybe, just maybe it reminds people of the fictional Jane in Tarzan stories. Possibly the male songwriters thought of the part where Tarzan and Jane try to communicate. “Me, Tarzan. You Jane.” Maybe that’s what the songwriters felt their conversations with attractive women were like.

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Fabricated Diagram

Posted on 15 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

My new book, Fabricated, links together fundamentally different fantasy machines. The following diagram lists these fantasy machines and the story in Fabricated that contains the link.

Notice how the arrows connecting the machines only go one way. This is because these aren’t straight equivalences. Going the other way between the machines is different. The other way is shown on the other side of the half arrows.

You can already get my book in paper or electronic form, from Amazon. the link is given at the top right. Sunday, April 23rd, I will be at the Stratford Book Fair for the hard launch of Fabricated. If you’re in southwestern Ontario that day you can see me there from 1pm to 6pm. Admission is free.

Notice that the bottom right corner of the diagram gives a tease of what the Interstellar Flit is about. It will be the first novel and second book in the series. All books in the series can stand alone.

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April 2023 Grab Bag o’ Humour

Posted on 8 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

As two letter abbreviations for Canadian provinces become more and more common in Canada, I looked up Newfoundland. NL is the two letter abbreviation for Newfoundland. This is way better than the four letter, Nfld., we were taught as kids.

Why is this much better? Well NFL – D means that Newfoundland is on the D list of football. The NFL or National Football League, is of course the A list of football. The CFL or Canadian Football League is the B list of football.

Going down by the same amount, the C list of football is any amateur game of football played anywhere. So the D list is usually reserved for places where they call soccer football – and, of course, Newfoundland.

Newfoundland is probably happy that we no longer rub it in their faces that they are on the football D list.

*

If I were a lead guitarist that used mainly a Fender guitar, like a stratocaster or even a telecaster, I would like to have the nickname Fender Bender.

But instead I am a rhythm guitarist that prefers non Fender guitars. So, if you see a good lead guitarist that does play a Fender, feel free to bestow the nickname on them.

I wonder if Frank Zappa used a strat because of the song Joe’s Garage which has the line, “it was a stratocaster with a whammy bar”. Maybe we can give the moniker to Zappa. There should be bonus points for the Fender Bender using a whammy bar, which bends the strings even more.

*

I have a brother, Lance, and a sister, Liana, who do realist art. They don’t have an obvious gimmick as with surrealism or impressionism. They just make paintings that are more or less how someone else would see or even how a camera would see.

As such, I call them realists. A tiger mom would call them completely nonrealists. They must be doctors or lawyers or engineers or scientists to get the realist moniker from her. Most artists are quite unrealistic according to this narrow view.

So how do I defend my point of view to those tiger moms out there and their allies? My brother and sister are realists enough to know that having a part time job at the same time while doing their art careers, is a good thing. This is why they’re realists.

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The Weakest Link in “Fabricated”

Posted on 1 April 2023 by Larry Russwurm

In my collection of short stories called “Fabricated”, I link together disparate fantasy machines. I’ve been saying they are strong links, but there is one weaker link. For time travel into the past, I substitute seeing into the past. I know that seeing into the past isn’t time travel. But there is a certain type of time travel, that doesn’t mess with cause and effect, that it does mimic.

I don’t want to give away my method of seeing into the past in my book, so I will use the only other way I know how to see into the past.

That other way is with ‘slow’ glass. The speed of light is a variable that is different depending on the medium it is in. Usually the speed of light in a vacuum is used as the constant for the speed of light. But it is different in different glasses and plastics.

Imagine a glass where the speed of light is slowed considerably. If you could make light slow down such that it travels through one pane of glass in 12 hours, you would have a cheap way to light a room at night.

Plus you could go outside and pose at the slow glass pane, then come inside and stand by the same pane and say “Look at that. I’m faster than light!” You would however have to wait almost 12 hours to prove it.

Also with 6 month slow glass, you could grow plants in the arctic in a greenhouse in the winter! Fresh vegetables and fruit, all year long.

Anyhow, I’ve been digressing. With slow glass you can see into the past. With lip readers you can even “hear” some of what was said. I liken it to the DC comics time travel of Superman.

I forget how, but Superman could go back to the past. When he did so, he was outlined in dashed lines in the comics. This was because he could not touch anything or speak to anyone or be seen. It was like he was a ghost. He could touch nothing and people would just walk through him. But he could see and hear things as they happened around him.

Notice that this DC comics time travel has no problems with cause and effect. He could just hear and see in the past. This is the same net effect of just seeing into the past. I may not have totally linked seeing into the past with time travel in “Fabricated”. But I believe I have done it here.

After writing this, I realize that I am going to have to include slow glass into my series. It’s too late for it to go in this book, but I see no reason it can’t be included in another book in the series. All for the sake of completeness.

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Late March, 2023, Grab Bag o’ Humour

Posted on 25 March 2023 by Larry Russwurm

People may question why McDonald’s brought out their new chicken Big Mac. I’m just wondering why it took them so long. Some might say the taste is a little bland after their palates have been accustomed to the normal Big Mac. But McDonald’s will quietly wait while those old taste palates become accustomed to the new offering.

When McDonald’s began, chicken meat was more expensive than ground beef. Changes in the shape of chickens (due to selective breeding) has changed this factor. Now chicken is the cheaper meat and McDonald’s is now waiting (and hoping) that they can change our taste buds to liking chicken better.

Wait for it. The Quarter Pound Chicken with Cheese is next up. But I expect McDonald’s to hedge their bets and keep offering hamburgers, too. If the consumer is going to try to be cheap about their purchases, McDonald’s has that covered. If the consumer prefers the taste of hamburgers, McDonald’s will have that covered as well.

*

There’s a little bit of surprise in the air that Succession is having it’s last season be the 4th season. It used to be that shows would pull out all the stops to make it to the 5th season. Why the 5th season? Well this is the magical year when most syndication deals are possible.

However, with the advent of streaming, and marathon small screen watching, making it to the 5th season isn’t quite as important. In other words, network television is losing some of its pull.

And the show creators all remember what happened to Babylon 5. It was planned to be a 5 season show from the outset. But I guess, 3rd season numbers weren’t what the network wanted to see. So they gave the warning: finish it off in the 4th season because that is as long as the show would get.

So the most important story ideas were finished off early. Everyone wanted to see how all the arcs would tie together in the end. Viewership went up. So much so, that at the end of the 4th season the network relented and said there would be a 5th season.

Now all the arcs didn’t get tied up in the 4th season, just most of the more important ones. Still the 5th season became known as an almost pointless season.

*

Some people are so adverse to losing that they will take me up on my next idea. If you’re going to play “she loves me, she loves me not” with a flower’s petals, why not use a trillium? This 3 petaled flower basically guarantees a win.

Assuming that “she loves me” is a win, that is. If you are playing the game with a she or he or a they that is so repugnant you can’t believe it, the answer is to play with a poppy. This four petaled flower guarantees that she/he/they will love you not.

And for those who don’t like winning for whatever messed up reason, use a poppy when it’s good to be loved and a trillium when it’s bad to be loved.

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Fabricated: My Book, Out Now

Posted on 18 March 2023 by Larry Russwurm

“Fabricated” is my first book that I have put out. It’s a collection of science fiction stories that dare pose the question: is there a grand unified theory of fantasy machines? While it doesn’t quite answer this, it provides strong links between totally separate fantasy machines,

While I don’t want to give away too much, one of these stories’ strong links has been around in various science fiction forms for decades. It links the replicator to the transporter.

If a replicator is thought of as a perfect scan and a 3D printer, it can mimic a transporter. All you need to do is send the information from the perfect scan to a far away 3D printer. Once the 3D printer has finished printing you, it’s exactly like you were transported to the far away printer. The only thing that gives away what really happened, is that you still exist in the scanning bay.

If it is important to create the illusion that this is just another transporter, your machinery can kill the unfortunate you inside the scanning bay. You may be dead, but from the outside world it looks like you are very much alive and have transported successfully.

That’s just one of the strong links in Fabricated. If you want to be there for the hard launch of Fabricated, and you live in or near Stratford, Ontario  or if you just want to check out some fine books, I will be at the Stratford Book Fair and Market on April 23, from 1pm to 6pm.

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