The Horny Shower Curtain

I’m about to surprise you, dear reader, by saying I know you’re attractive. You’re saying to yourself right now, “How could he possibly know that – this must be one of those psychic tricks.”

But not only do I know that, I can prove it. You see, I know that you’re so attractive that when you take a shower, the shower curtain can’t control itself and gets closer and closer to you. To the shower curtain, you are indeed attractive.

Now some people might bore you with rationalizations. They might go something like this: “As the water is turned on, a partial vacuum is created and blah blah blah”.

But I know it is because you’re attractive that the shower curtain gets so close. Indeed it might even brush up against you or attempt to wrap itself around you. The shower curtain could be said to be horny.

I’ve even found out from asking attractive people of both sexes that the attraction transcends gender. You just have to be attractive. Maybe the shower curtain is bi. However can something be bi when we don’t know what sex it is to begin with?

I’ve asked attractive transgendered people and the report is the same. The shower curtain remains horny despite sexual reassignment.

With cross dressers there is the same report but that could have been assumed by the transgendered experience.

I even knew someone with an (I guess) attractive ferret. You see, even after being descented, ferrets get a bit smelly, so every week is a good time to wash them. My friend used to take his ferret into the shower with him. The ferret enjoyed the shower and was fresh smelling afterwords. This friend reported to me that the shower curtain would attempt to touch him and the ferret. So even attractive animal species are considered fair game by the horny shower curtain.

Postscript.

Maybe it is the “blah blah blah” and shower curtains always are attracted inwards. That’s for the ‘bestiality’ – offended of you. Personally I believe and continue to believe that the shower curtain’s actions prove that I am attractive.

Postscript the Second

Maybe the French, in their ongoing effort to see everything as masculine or feminine can tell us the sex of “shower curtain”. Anyone know that much French? I thought of looking it up in one of those online translators but it’s two words in English.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
This entry was posted in Humour, Science and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

16 Responses to The Horny Shower Curtain

  1. Pingback: Could we be behind the black mold problem? |

  2. Pingback: Easy Bathroom Remodeling Tip |

  3. Pingback: KO curtain helps battle blazes; Fort Lee firefighters get training | Custom made suit

  4. Pingback: pro bono plastic surgery ,sex reassignment? | Money From Traffic

  5. Pingback: Q&A: Dream of infertility and baby bear with peacock attribute. Totem? | The Golf Cart Store

  6. Pingback: Nate Berkus Open Eyelet Shower Curtain | Home Accessories Decor

  7. Pingback: A city asleep no more: Shanghai moves forward | BingSite

  8. Pingback: How to make thermal curtains | Home Decor Picture

  9. Pingback: Turn Your Bathroom Into a Spa Oasis With Feng Shui |

  10. Pingback: Do you think this is fair? |

  11. Pingback: What’s the best way to prevent clothing damage? | dress up bolg

  12. Pingback: Happy Blogiversary « The Many Rants of Larry Russwurm

  13. ferrets care says:

    I love ferrets! I love the sharing and caring of ferrets all across the internet! Thanks!

  14. Strange this post is totaly unrelated to what I was searching google for, but it was listed on the first page. I guess your doing something right if Google likes you enough to put you on the first page of a non related search. 🙂

  15. Pingback: “My Shower Curtain is a Slut” | The Many Rants of Larry Russwurm

  16. dating sites says:

    Thanks so much with regard to giving me an update on this topic on your website. Please know that if a brand-new post appears or when any alterations occur about the current submission, I would be interested in reading more and focusing on how to make good use of those strategies you reveal. Thanks for your efforts and consideration of other individuals by making this blog available.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *