Cardi B has 13 songs in the top 100 on Billboard so let’s look at her name and where she got it from. Apparently her nickname in the hood was Bacardi but she couldn’t use this for trademark reasons. So she changed it to Cardi B. Just different enough not to infringe on anything. We at Many Rants are not so high minded and intend to steal this naming scheme for humour reasons.
The first alcohol I thought of to try changing was Jack Daniels. We could change it up to Daniels J. But that just seems like Daniels, J which could refer to many people in the Daniels family. So perhaps we could make it different with an apostrophe and one other change. How about Daniel’s Jay. So what is this bird of Daniel’s and will he be flipping it at us?
How about Nadian Club C? First of all, what is a Nadian? This of course refers to an inhabitant of Nadia. She might have all sorts of gut flora, etc., that could be inside her. Club is self explanatory (a group of anything might be called a club) and C could mean Sea where any wet innards could be called a sea.
Then there is my favourite of this naming scheme: Rince Igor P. Or Rinse Igor Pee. I’m more inclined to pressure wash Igor’s pee down the nearest drain than rinse it, but some might not be such a stickler for cleanliness.
This naming scheme reminds me of Jennifer Lopez’s: J Lo from about a decade ago. It is such an ingrained naming scheme that no one bats an eyelash at Jennifer Lawrence being called J Law. I am not, however, going to use this naming scheme on present or even stars of this millennium. I am going to use it on older stars.
Alan Ladd was a western film actor around the middle of the 20th century. Perhaps his parents wanted him to be forever youthful – because the J Lo version of his name is A Lad.
Robert Redford is a more recent actor who is still alive. I suspect his parents were big communist sympathizers. After all, if they predicted the J Lo shortening at his birth they might have noticed the Bob Redford shortening or B Red.
Sir Peter Ustinov was an English actor, writer and director. Of course his parents could hardly have foreseen his knighting, but they could have foreseen the J Lo shortening. His name becomes P U. His parents must have also realized this would be his name when using initials. How could you name someone the initials of 2/3 of pun?