Scourge of the Twenties

I guess I should have known that no good would happen when I let off some long pent up steam in one of my posts years ago. That post, Scourge of the Nineties, aimed to show modern people the problem with living in the nineties. That’s because car alarms weren’t installed properly and would go off at inopportune times. I naively thought this had been fixed everywhere simply because I hadn’t heard one for years.

Then someone moved in to the building next door with an improperly installed car alarm. I am well aware of this because my apartment overlooks their parking lot. I have heard it many, many times. And the owner can’t be bothered to get to it right away so it goes on for a couple minutes every single time.

I’ve racked my brain for a solution but haven’t been able to come up with a good one easily. First of all, I thought of assassination. But with the owner dead, that car alarm is going to just go off for an ungodly amount of time before someone figures out how to stop those horrible noises it makes.

My second idea would be to break in and disable the car alarm itself. What an ironic response to a car alarm. I was thinking of wrecking the alarm and leaving the car alone. It’s just that I don’t know that much about cars or car alarms. So even though the owner takes a long response time, undoubtedly they’d be on time to see me and my wrench working away on the car. I’d have to run to avoid being caught.

Remember I wanted to leave the car alone. But the irresponsible owner has painted me into a corner. I have to get the word out on the street that despite the car alarm it will be an easy to steal car in that parking lot. Yes, it has an alarm but everyone who might be able to stop the act of theft will not, as per usual, act. You see at this point, the car alarm is like white noise to the listeners, since they have heard it so frequently.

Anyhow a professional car thief will be able to turn off the car alarm and drive away with their prize. Long before Mr. I’ll Turn My Car Alarm Off When I’m Good And Ready gets to the scene.

I just hope the car thief doesn’t leave the car alarm installed in the car and leave my problem to a new neighbourhood. One where the paranoid, alarm loving owner buys hot automobiles (more irony). But hey, the problem will be out of my neighbourhood.

About Larry Russwurm

Just another ranter on the Internet
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