Naturally when I heard the name of the royal couple (Will and Kate) being the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, I suspected that they would visit the city directly to the south of me when they chose to visit Canada. That city, Cambridge, has over 100 000 people and I thought that city would be a blip upon the royals’ radar.
So, shocked that city didn’t make the itinerary of the royal couple, I looked at their schedule again. Ottawa ( another city in Ontario), the Northwest Territories, Alberta and P. E. I. Wait one moment, PEI is no larger population wise than the city of Cambridge.
Then why don’t the royal couple visit Cambridge? After all they are known as the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.
Hmmm. Despite being home to the school of architecture of the university of Waterloo, Cambridge, Ontario has no palace or castle. That must be why the Duke and Duchess are snubbing their namesake city. If we could only make them feel at home.
Indeed they are extending their tour into rebel territory, the so-called USA, and aren’t visiting Cambridge, Massachusetts or the other 6 Cambridges mentioned in my atlas of the world (seriously, did the Simpsons think of this as a name for their hometown?).
So of course the name of the Duke and Duchess must of course refer to a United Kingdom city. And indeed there is a city of Cambridge in the UK. However there is no residence that the Royals stay at, according to what I could find on the Internet.
So. They are holding out for a palace in whichever city of Cambridge would be first to build a nice palace for them. So all you extremely rich United Empire Loyalists that settled in Ontario, just give a huge sum of money to the school of architecture of the University of Waterloo in Cambridge, Ontario so that nice palace can be built for them. Then we can have the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge sit where they belong in southwestern Ontario. None of this Ottawa nonsense. Cambridge, Ontario must be the first and only visiting-Canada-home to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.